Bet that feels worse on your cheeks than Jessica's inner thighs, huh.
Yesterday was magnificent. Oh sooooooo magnificent! Thank you, thank you, NFL gods.
A postseason without the Patriots, the Cowboys, and Brett Favre? The Lions actually finishing 0-16? The Chargers starting the season off 4-8, then somehow making the playoffs over the 2007/2008-Mets-level-meltdown-style Broncos? Fan-friggin'-tastic. Bonus: That last bit led to this marvelous image of Jay Cutler looking like someone just made fun of him in front of the whole school!
Jay Cutler's Indian name is Quivering Lips McGee.
(More Cutler pics here.)
Schadenfreude, that elusive mistress of others' miseries, also gave us this marvelous, stupendous, splendiferous, scrumtrelecent story of a certain Cowboy quarterback's postgame shower incident (Cue prison-rape jokes.):
"Tony Romo's three turnovers were momentarily meaningless [Ed. note: Not true.] Sunday night when players started yelling in the shower after the quarterback collapsed...When asked later what happened, Romo said, 'Um, you know, I was just a little banged up, I guess.'"
Man, sometimes the Romo-collapsing-on-the-field-AND-in-the-shower jokes just write themselves.
Reached for comment, Terrell Owens -- fighting through tears -- said, "That's my teammate!"
Quivering Lips McGee's distant cousin, Sniffling Bitchboy Johnson.