What's The Deal With Sarah Palin? (bwa ba ba ba bwaaaw)

That was a really poor approximation of the Seinfeld noise in the title there.

Like really though, what's the deal with Sarah Palin? Maybe I'm just a liberal elite, but like the list of pros and cons for Sarah Palin for me looks like this

Pro
She's extraordinarily attractive

Con
Everything else

Like, I'm not gonna start a grassroots campaign for a Kardashian / Lohan 2012 ticket. What's the goddamn appeal? She's not smart, experienced, part of a family with a longstanding political tradition, able to see Russia from her back door, or anything else that would make me want to vote for someone.

Am I like two years late with this post? Yes, yes I am. Really, though, I coulda sworn she was just gonna fade into the background. Motherfuckin' Admiral Stockdale didn't try to capitalize on his fumbled up bid for vice president, why would she?

Can't Make This Shit Up

A couple weeks ago:
Student: "So mista, was Shakespeare's time back when they had, like, castles and dragons and everything?"
Me: "You mean like everyone was walking their pet dragons around?"
Student: "Yeah."
Me: "Ah, no, that's more medieval times, which was like 0 - 1300. Shakespeare was in the 1600s."
Student: "Zero, no way. That was like cavemen and stuff."
Me: [pause] "Good luck on that Global History Regents exam."
Student: "Huh? I already passed that."


Today (Not sure what's up with the Shakespeare theme):
Student: "Mista, we're reading MacBeth. That shit is mad boring. Did you ever read MacBeth?"
Me: "Yeah, I read it in middle school."
Student: "Middle school (eyes wide)? Damn, that book must be old."


Also today (no Shakespeare here, but still worth it):
Student 1: "Shit, I'm hungry. I'm gonna go get a Pepsi with my benefit card." (the fact that the Pepsi was going to constitute her lunch is not really germane to the story, but is an interesting side note.)
Student 2: "Yo, that benefit card is the shit. I used to be embarrassed to use it, but now I just roll in like, 'What!', swipe."
Student 3: "For real, it's hot. You got a benefit card, mista?"
Me: "What are you even talking about?"
Student 1: "Son, you get a benefit card, then you go to the grocery and just swipe it and you don't got to give any money."
Student 2: "Yeah, but you can't O.D. on it. You gotta get food. You can't go to the grocery and get like plates and shit."
Me: "Where do you get it from?"
Student 2: "From the government."
Student 3: "You should get one mista. All hispanic people have them."
Me: "I don't think it has anything to do with being hispanic."
Student 3: "All the hispanic people I know have them."
Me: "So, is there a limit or can you get as much food as you want?"
Student 2: "No, there's a limit, but you don't ever really reach it. I think it's like 600."
Me: "Can you roll over the money?"
Student 1: "I think you can. Also if you want to you can get cash with it."
Student 2: "Word, we get the food and then my mom gets the 100 cash."
Me: "So, everyone in your family has a card to use whenver they want?"
Student 2: "No, it has my mom's picture on it. But I can just go and use it."
Student 1: "Yeah, my mom's picture is on mine. But she didn't like the picture she had on it so she went and got another one."
Me: "Your mom didn't like the picture on her benefit card so she went and got a new one?"
Student 1: "Yeah."

Still Crazy After All These Years

So much has changed in recent days, what with the untimely deaths of Michael Jackson, Steve McNair, Farrah Fawcett and Arturro Gatti; the resignation of everyone's favorite hot Republican governor, Sarah Palin; and Iran & China going crazy with protesters.

Fortunately, however, dear blog reader even in these uncertain times where the world seems to be changing daily we can hold on to one constant.

One sure thing.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, do not fear because whatever happens, Ron Artest will always be crazy.

Bless his heart.

My one question is: is Ron dying next year or is Michael returning from the dead?