Showing posts with label why I don't go to clubs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label why I don't go to clubs. Show all posts

Friday, August 20, 2010

Ground Zero Mosque: Naked Chicks Edition

Earlier this week, we offered up some cutting satire about the so-called Ground Zero Mosque controversy. We laughed, we cried; it was better than Cats.

Today our focus turns to some of the other affronts to human dignity within sultry strutting distance of the WTC site: strip clubs. Both New York Dolls and the Pussycat Lounge are close enough to the WTC site for workers to make a pilgrimage at lunch, or just visit five times a day (too much?). (Note: I can't access the link because our computers at work have all sorts of filters, etc. I assume it's fine, but you've been warned).

[see above re: big brother; now imagine a picture of a really hot stripper here]

God Bless America!

Apparently it is insensitive and an insult to those who died on 9/11 to construct an interfaith Muslim community center within a few blocks of the WTC site. But there is nothing wrong with some light human trafficking and sexual debauchery around the corner. Got it?

Conditional props go to the Wall Street Journal for picking this up and writing it down. The condition is because they are right-leaning and the story was a little too fair and balanced for my taste (like actually fair and balanced; not the way Sean Hannity means it), but props because anyone with 1/10th of a brain (i.e., most of the WSJ's readers - zing!) would appreciate the contrast between people getting fired up about a church (yes, a church, that's all it is to them you bigots) on the one hand and nobody giving a shit about a bunch of strip clubs on the other. (Run-on sentence alert. Open Bar awards me -5 points).

According to the WSJ:

As supporters held signs extolling religious freedom at the site of the proposed Islamic center Wednesday, a stripper who gave her name as Cassandra was working the afternoon shift at New York Dolls on Murray Street — just around the corner.
“I don’t know what the big deal is,” Cassandra said. “It’s freedom of religion, you know?”
And according to Chris, a stripper who volunteered in the Ground Zero recovery, and who lost eight friends on Sept. 11, 2001 - firefighters from the Brooklyn firehouse next to her home at the time:
“They’re not building a mosque in the World Trade Center,” she pointed out. “It’s all good. You have your synagogues and your churches. And you have a mosque.” She concluded: “The people who did it are not going to the mosque.”
Amen. Out of the mouths of babes . . .

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

There's us, and then there's these guys

Inbreds don't only live in West Virginia.

I like to think of this particular blog as proudly pro-New Jersey. But once in a while, I come across something that reminds me that while we may represent what is best about our fair state, New Jersey is still packed to the jagerbombs with douchebags. 

I just spent five agonizing minutes browsing through some of the pictures on this site from hell, ClubItUp. It was created by someone called Franky Stylez (natch), who looks exactly as you would suspect. You can learn much more about him here. My favorite part? "Franky Stylez Catch Phrase [sic]: 'I am about to get sick wit it' and 'Touch it.'" (Touch what? Ew, gross, no way.)

The site promotes clubs in New Jersey. That, added to what I mentioned above about my dawg Franky Stizzles, should tell you just about all you need to know. I think that every time this site posts a picture, an angel gets mauled by a syphilitic bear.