Thursday, September 30, 2010

The Dumbening of America's Youth

I just want you all to know. We're fucked.

Example. The kids nowadays when they're writing, like writing using a pen and paper, will write stuff like, "U in da way :)", in which the word "You" is spelled "u", "the" is spelled like "da" (appropos, no?) and the emoticon colon parenthesis is written out as an emoticon instead of just a regular smiley face.

I feel like I want to write like a whole essay about why it's retarded to write out an emoticon and about how the emoticon has now come to actually represent the thing it was meant to symbolize and replaced it altogether. It would be a whole long thing and I would be really angry at the end. So instead I'll just express my frustration like this:

>:-(

Blog Fatigue

Just because we only had 3 posts this month, an all time low, it's clearly time for a visit from our spokesmodel.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

When Does Football Start? I Mean Baseball, No Basketball. I Mean, Dammit.

Well, here we are gentlemen. Gone is the miracle year of 1986 when both the Mets and Giants won their respective championships. Gone is 2000 when both the Mets and Giants competed for their respective championships. Gone are the 1990s when the Knicks were reliably the third or fourth best team in the NBA, and provided many great moments along with the heartache they would always eventually deliver. Gone is 1994 when the Rangers won the cup and I actually followed hockey. Gone even is 2008, just a couple short years ago, in which the upstart Giants took down the mighty Pats in the Super Bowl.

Here we are.

We are at a standstill. The Mets are absolutely terrible. And they have little hope for improving next year. The Giants? Terrible. No heart. No discipline. No nothing except a 7-9 season in their future. The Knicks? Terrible doesn't even begin to describe it. No wins, no point guard, and, worst of all in this past off season, no David Lee (who I'm admittedly gay for). They do get occasional consultation from Isiah Thomas, however. So there's that. Are the Rangers even still a team? I can't really say for sure.

I can't believe I'm caught up in this Mets thing. I came to the Mets late in the game precisely because of this. Why am I caught up in this in the first place? I laughed a smug laugh in 1998 when the Mets blew the wild card. Why do I care about this? Damn you Mets.

What has changed with the Giants since they won the Super Bowl? They have the same offensive line, the same QB, the same running backs (don't give that Ward nonsense), the same pass rushers essentially. Strahan was a leader on the field and off, I get that, but does Michael Strahan turn this team from Super Bowl champions to the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked? They're arguably more athletic at that position now than they were then. They're definitely deeper. Where has their heart gone? PS - it's time for some new gies on the offensive line.

The Knicks are...whatever, I don't even care. I'm a Nets fan now. Or maybe I'm a Thunder fan. Maybe I'll be a post-Lebron Cleveland fan. But that would be just as bad as being a Knicks fan, I guess.

So, does anybody know how the Red Bulls are looking this year?

I Guess There's A First Time For Everything

Today, for the first time, I drove over the Brooklyn Bridge. I have driven over the Williamsburg Bridge a bunch of times. And the Manhattan Bridge a few times, too. But I've never had a reason to drive over the Brooklyn Bridge before today.

I have a memory of walking over the Brooklyn Bridge once in college, but it is all together unclear. I have a pretty specific picture in my mind of entering the walking path from the Brooklyn side. It's so specific that I feel like it must have happened, though I can't say that I'm a hundred percent sure that it did. If I ever walk over it again, then I'll be able to confirm the mental image I have of the walking path entrance.

Anyway, driving over the bridge looked a little less like this


And a little more like this

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Old Reliable


Well, at least they're consistent!

The Gambino Crime Family.....oops, sorry, the MTA is letting everyone know that fare hikes are once again likely.

Once again they have been totally blindsided because they say they have collected about $900 millioin due to depressed tax revenues and another $149 million because of reduced state funds.

In case you're counting that's over $1 billion dollars of funds that they will not be receiving. And they didn't see it coming.

I know Side Bar disagrees and thinks that the MTA leadership is doing a bang-up job, but in my opinion these people are either criminals or just astoundingly incompetent. I guess they're just kind of incompetent criminals.