Monday, December 29, 2008

What a wonderful world!

Bet that feels worse on your cheeks than Jessica's inner thighs, huh.

Yesterday was magnificent. Oh sooooooo magnificent! Thank you, thank you, NFL gods.

A postseason without the Patriots, the Cowboys, and Brett Favre? The Lions actually finishing 0-16? The Chargers starting the season off 4-8, then somehow making the playoffs over the 2007/2008-Mets-level-meltdown-style Broncos? Fan-friggin'-tastic. Bonus: That last bit led to this marvelous image of Jay Cutler looking like someone just made fun of him in front of the whole school!

Jay Cutler's Indian name is Quivering Lips McGee.

(More Cutler pics here.)

Schadenfreude, that elusive mistress of others' miseries, also gave us this marvelous, stupendous, splendiferous, scrumtrelecent story of a certain Cowboy quarterback's postgame shower incident (Cue prison-rape jokes.):
"Tony Romo's three turnovers were momentarily meaningless [Ed. note: Not true.] Sunday night when players started yelling in the shower after the quarterback collapsed...

When asked later what happened, Romo said, 'Um, you know, I was just a little banged up, I guess.'"
Man, sometimes the Romo-collapsing-on-the-field-AND-in-the-shower jokes just write themselves.

Reached for comment, Terrell Owens -- fighting through tears -- said, "That's my teammate!"

Quivering Lips McGee's distant cousin, Sniffling Bitchboy Johnson.


ChuckJerry said...

Couldn't have said it any better.

Walt Clyde Frazier said...

Let me remind you that the team that pounded those Cowboys will be at the Meadowlands in a week and a half to pull off a big playoff upset.

Side Bar said...

Well said. Three thoughts:

1. scrumtrelecent has got to be the best word ever. Will Ferrell is a fucking genius.

2. Walt Clyde - this whole Eagles thing has got to stop. It was cute for a little while because you live down there now and we all sort of respect that. But it's time to knock it off. You grew up in the shadows of that pantheon of football, Giants Stadium. We'll still take you back, but the window is closing.

3. On a somewhat related note, I am terrified about the Eagles-Giants game in two weeks. As in like losing-sleep-and-kicking-pigeons-more-often-than-usual terrified.

Walt Clyde Frazier said...

I was never a Giants fan, for the record. I pull for them because of my love for you guys. Now, if I truly sell out on the Knicks for the Sixers, then I deserve to be bitched out constantly until I'm 40 or so. It's hard to watch either of those teams, though, whereas it's easy to watch both the Giants and the Eagles.