Shitequette

I was dropping the Cosby Kids off at the pool this morning and was quite annoyed when someone chose the stall directly next to mine, especially because have not two, three, four or five, but six stalls in the bathroom.

I work in an office with seemingly well groomed, professional people and yet they the bathroom looks like it could be a petting zoo.

Here are the official LJT rules of using the office restroom:

1. If you are the only one in the bathroom, the stalls are yours for the choosing.
2. If someone else is there, choose the stall as far away as possible from the second shitter. An exception can be made for a handicap stall, however, my legs fall asleep because they are so much higher than regular toilets. Why are handicapped people so tall anyway?
3. After wiping, check the toilet seat. It's disgusting to find little pieces of toilet paper and hair on a toilet seat when you walk in.
   
4. Courtesy flush. No one wants to see your leftover turds. Yes, even yours.
5. Piss in the urinal. With more than one pisser, apply rule number one to urinating as well.
   
6. If there are two urinals next to eachother, you may still use the second urinal but it is acceptable to drain your Johnson in a stall, however:
7. Pick the fucking seat up and if you don't - you pig - at least fucking wipe the seat. I don't know if it's more than one person in my office pees on toilet seats and it's completely and totally disgusting.
8. Wash your hands.
   

Follow these rules and you will be a courteous and responsible office shitter.