Thursday, September 25, 2008


The last week has been unkind to Grandpa Simpson - I mean, um, John McCain.

The economy is failing and with Republicans having been in power for most of the past decade people are blaming Republicans for some reason.

To make matters worse, a serious problem is lack of regulation played a big part in leading us down this road.

That's an especially big problem when you like to call yourself "fundamentally, a deregulator" and have admitted that economics is not your strong suit (even if that quote may have been taken out of context just a bit).

Adding to Mr. McCain's woes is that the Palin Train seems to be losing steam as the people dig into her past.

Let's recap, shall we?
  • Her daughter just got knocked up.
  • Her son, being deployed to Iraq is said to have some drug problems.
  • She announced that we are on a mission from God in Iraq.
  • She then changed her story, trying to channel a quote from Abraham Lincoln that really was not at all similar to what she said.
  • She actually was for that bridge to nowhere before she was against it.
  • She was for banning books from local libraries.
  • She had rape victims pay for their own rape kits.
  • She apparently was banging her next door neighbor and husband's business partner.
  • She has had three interviews: Charlie Gibson, in which she came across as a lightweight - to put it nicely; Katie Couric, in which she came across as a lightweight - to put it nicely; and Sean Hannity - which, let's face it, doesn't really count.
  • She's accused of firing the former boss of her ex-brother in law because he wouldn't fire said ex-brother in law.
  • The anti-corruption crusader, actually ran Ted Steven's political action committee.
  • She billed taxpayers for travel and expenses for staying at her own home, as opposed to the Governor's Mansion, for 312 nights in the short time she spent as governor of Alaska.
  • Put her high school buddies in government jobs that they were not even remotely qualified for.
  • Her preacher, Thomas Muthee really hates witches.
There's more but, I think you get the point: she's a disaster.

They're just hoping her vagina and Christianity is enough for the American people (and, truth be told, the jury is still out on that one).

Now, with his polls dropping and time running out and on the cusp of the first presidential debate - what does John McCain do?

He calls a timeout??

What the fuck? Can you do that?

He's heading back to Washington DC to.....go to meetings. Oh, and he wants to cancel the scheduled debate because.....he has to go to meetings. I know he isn't really too good with computers but are telephones and airplanes too much for him too?

He really just wants to change the subject and position himself to claim credit for this bailout that is going to come one way or the other - regardless of whether or not he actually goes to DC.

Apparently, Obama called him at 8:30 in the morning on Wednesday to issue a joint statement. Grandpa Simpson returned the call at 2:30 pm and they agreed to issue some sort of joint statement and then, shortly thereafter, GP Simpson came out and announced the timeout.

Bitch-move, Macca. I'm guessing you're not taking the Straight Talk Express back to DC?

I thought Barry handled it nicely, saying that the president needs to be able to multitask.

I think people will see through this and it will ultimately backfire: there's no crying in baseball and there's no siestas in presidential elections - even if you are 100 years old.

I suppose it was a nice try to switch up the game with a gimmick, Johnny Mac - but the thing with Hail Mary passes is that they usually end up incomplete.

"I'm John McCain and, I..........I want a timeout..."

1 comment:

rick said...

Tree-men-dus post Luvix!! you certainly won it today. McGrandpa is kinda bitchin out. The Chris Webber pic is perfect. I can't wait for the debates, especially the VP debates.