Color me mildly unimpressed. A few nice speeches, sure. But I still feel like this convention hasn't been hitting the ball out of the park. The ball is there, it's right fucking there, sitting on a tee waiting to get knocked the fuck out. To paraphrase a certain someone, GET THE BALL! WIN IT, BARRY!
Though I didn't see it, I hear that John Kerry actually gave the best speech tonight. WTF? I saw Bill's speech, and it was good. Not great, certainly not his best stuff, though he did have a few nice points. My favorite:
"The world has always been more impressed by the power of our example than the example of our power."Well said. I don't think he did as well as he could have, but I'm not as low on him as I was a few days ago.
Joey Biden did all right too, I guess. I was hoping for some outright trashing of John McCain. Biden gave us a bit of that, but not enough. I loved the "Freudian slip" part, and I really can't tell if it was rehearsed or not. (I've directed enough actors to be confident that I can usually tell that stuff, but with Biden, he just does that stuff naturally sometimes. So who knows? Wouldn't really surprise me either way.)
But (Kerry aside) where the fuck were the harsh attacks on McCain? Where were the brutal reminders of the innumerable atrocities perpetrated by the Bush administration? Where were the incisive reminders that what the other side has done the last seven years has failed pretty much every single time?
Here is a brief rundown of what we're likely to hear next week at the Republican convention:
- Barack Obama cannot be trusted.
- Barack Obama wants us be attacked by terrorists.
- Barack Obama wants to kill babies.
- Barack Obama hates God.
- Barack Obama hates you.
- Barack Obama is a suicide bomber.
- Barack Obama rapes children.
- Barack Obama was a major inspiration for Hitler.
- Barack Obama is fucking your wife.
- Barack Obama cheats at Monopoly.
- Barack Obama got AIDS from a poodle because he's into bestiality and he's gay as fuck.
- Barack Obama takes shits on the American flag, then burns that flag and leaves it on your elderly mother's doorstep.
- Michelle Obama is his sister. SAME LAST NAME?!?!?!?!?
But where was the shit about how Bush enabled and embraced torture as foreign policy? I really don't get it. To me, the biggest failure, the thing that has the farthest-reaching consequences is this administration's usage of fucking TORTURE as a main tool in the war on terror. How in the fuck did this happen? America's moral leadership is shot to hell right now -- not so much because of the Iraq war, though that is certainly part of it -- mostly because we've been TORTURING people and explaining it away for the last few years.
And what about Dick Fucking Cheney? Why the fuck has no one (rhetorically) shot that bastard in the face?
I guess there's Al Gore tomorrow, too. Maybe he'll come with the machete. Al, like Kerry tonight, has shown a remarkable growth in testicular fortitude since losing the presidential election. Forgive me if I'm a bit leery of it happening a third time in a row.
Argh. I hate making snap judgments about shit like this, because it's politics and you never really know how things are going to play. And hey, there's still one more day.
I'm not a Chicken Little. I don't care that the national polls have tightened the last few weeks. National polls don't mean shit anyway. And I've learned over the past year that Barack Obama is, in fact, smarter than I am. He beat the Clintons. That's still pretty unbelievable. I'm sure he has a plan, and after all, there are still more than two months till November 4th. I trust ya, Barry. But for God's sake, get someone out there to -- pardon my if you've heard this before -- cut McCain's nuts off.
I'm with ya, Barry. And to repeat what I said earlier: GET THE BALL! WIN IT, BARRY!