Friday, February 13, 2009

Dear Bud Selig, You Dirty Two-Faced Motherfucker

This motherfucker Bug Selig is talking about how A-Rod brought shame to the game of baseball and about how he is contemplating some sort of disciplinary action against him and how he's thinking about reinstating Hank Aaron's home run record when we all know that the worst person in this whole affair is not A-Rod, not Barry Bonds, not Roger Clemens, not even Don Fehr (oh you're next motherfucker), but Bud Selig himself.

I cannot believe the nerve of this fucking ass clown who oversaw the expansion of the drug culture in baseball, did nothing about it, fought Congress to keep them from holding hearings, worked with the union to find the easiest way to cover up their transgressions, and tacitly approved of Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa shooting each other up at home plate during the 7th inning stretch at Wrigley Field while Harry Caray sang his heart out. This simple minded motherfucker has known since 2003 that Alex Rodriguez had tested positive for steroids. Six years those test results sat on his desk and he was giving out awards and watching games, saying nothing when A-Rod won 3 MVP awards since then, and then because some overzealous reporter and whichever government agency continues to leak like a sieve plucked one name from the list now he wants to threaten some kind of repercussions. What about those other hundred odd gies who's names are still sitting sealed on your desk you combover Skeletor looking cocksucker?

In summary, Bud Selig is an asshole, a liar, a pawn for the players' union, has no real power in baseball, a poor excuse even for a figurehead, a dirty motherfucker, and a pretentious cock. Why he is still the commissioner is beyond me.

PS - What the fuck was Buck Showalter doing in Texas at the turn of the millenium? He was the manager/GM and oversaw the careers of A-Rod, I-Rod, Juan Gonzalez, Rafael Palmeiro, and Ken Caminiti (in 2001). And those are just the guys who I'm 99% certain were using steroids at the time. Who knows about guys like Ruben Sierra and Kenny Rogers?

4 comments:

Open Bar said...

Ruben Sierra never did steroids, don't be absurd.

He does like to masturbate turtles though. He was a bit of a clubhouse oddball, several Rangers said.

Walt Clyde Frazier said...

Well said, Chuck.

Anonymous said...

"What about those other hundred odd gies who's names are still sitting sealed on your desk you combover Skeletor looking cocksucker." Charles, can I use that line in my life sometime whenever somebody pisses me off? It may not make sense in most situations but it does sound really cool, I will use my Jules Winfield (Samuel L.) from Pulp Fiction Voice.
I just thought of a situation where I could use your line and it would sort of make sense.
Your line could be used to motivate a board member of a non-profit organization to continue to solicit for the org. "Well I know you just helped secure a gift for $10,000 last week, but What about those other hundred odd gies who's names are still sitting sealed on your desk you combover Skeletor looking cocksucker!" (thanks Charles, you have continued my professional development.)-winit

ChuckJerry said...

Glad I could help.